let me tell you a good way to live your life. don't drink too much. how do you know if you've had too much to drink? here's a way: if you start betting money on games of yahtzee, YOU NEED TO STOP DRINKING.

i lost ten dollars to richard, and then when i got home at 2am i called none other than the one person i swore i'd stop speaking to for my own good. david.

that right there is another sign that one has had too much to drink. when you call people you're mad at and end up crying. i barely remember any of the conversation, but i know i cried. i know i told him about the letter i wrote him that i'll never send, and i said one thing that i said in that letter:

"i always thought that guys who cheated on their girlfriends were either assholes, or they really cared about the girl they cheated with. i said to myself, 'david isn't an asshole, so we must be getting back together.' it turned out you were just an asshole."

sad, drunkenly put together, but so fucking true. and to me, worth remembering.

nora and i were looking at this apartment guide tonight at work, because we want to move in together in around our sophomore or junior years of college. we realized that with our combined incomes (and her parents', who are keen on helping her pay rent once she's in school), we could afford to live in a pretty nice apartment. score!

sidenote: i know that sam has wanted to get a place with me for awhile, and this is really worrying me. she hasn't really brought it up recently, but i think it would really hurt her feelings if me and nora moved in together. i don't want to hurt her feelings, and in some aspects it could be fun living with her. but in the longrun, i know it would be a bad idea. we get annoyed with each other when we spend too much time together now, and we don't even live together. i mean, who the hell knows if it wouldn't end up being a bad idea to live with nora. but i know that nora and i are a lot more capable of giving each other a break when we need it, even if we lived together. and i mean, sam would be welcome over all the time, of course, but i hope she'll realize that it's not a good idea for us to live together.

THAT is just worrying me. it sucks that it is, because it's not even a sure thing that nora and i would move in together... and it wouldn't even be until a year or two from now. but i can't even bring it up to sam now because i'm afraid of her reaction.

ANYWAY. looking at apartment listings makes me feel grown up. and i realized that if we were to live in a nice place, one thing would definitely have to change.

I WOULD HAVE TO STOP GAMBLING MY FUCKING MONEY AWAY TO HUSTLERS LIKE RICHARD.

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